Wash the fried dal very well, drain and add this to a heavy bottom large pan.
Now add 4 1/2 water (about 3 times water) to cook dal. Cover with a lid, stir in between. Cook over medium heat cook till dal is done.
Once the dal is cooked mashed it lightly. You can leave a few whole dals if you like some texture in your payasam. It is a personal preference how mashed the dal should be.
Add jaggery syrup. Make sure that the dal is cooked well before adding jaggery. Bring it to boil and add washed chowari.
Then simmer dal in jaggery syrup until very thick, the idea is to let the water evaporate and the dal is soaked up in jaggery, like when it moves to a side it will stay. Add 2 tbsp ghee in between as needed so the dal doesn't stick on the pan. In the traditional recipe, the split mung dal or parippu is stirred in jaggery syrup (sharkara pain) over medium-low heat to enhance the flavor.
Add the third extract of coconut milk, mix it very well, and let it boil and stir until very thick
Add second extract, repeat the same over medium heat
When it become thick again, add fist thick coconut milk and crushed cardamom.
Check the taste and add jaggery syrup if needed. Adjust to your sweetness.
Once you add the thick coconut milk do not allow it to boil as this might cause the coconut milk to curdle. Once it is warm and before start to boil switch off the heat and add ground spices.
Switch off the heat.